The beauty of the world, right before your eyes. The good and the bad, the beauty and the beast, happiness and sadness. At the same time. I didn't know what it was before. I don't know what it is right now. The acceptance and realization of the direction you want to go is an extraordinary moment. A feeling of ease, a transition and transformation, that is what it might be.
Whatever you are after, your happiness can be explained in many different ways, there are no good or bad explanations. That is the beauty of your life. Feeling is experiencing and experiencing is believing. Free your mind and the rest will follow.